Welcome to 1-2-3 Inner Game, your weekly hit of actionable strategies to achieve a high-performing, healthy, and thriving life.
Today’s Highlights
- Relationships by Design
- 1-2-3 Inner-Game
- The DNA of Greatness – Is Success Wired or Learned
- Brain Candy
- What’s Fueling My Curiosity
PART 1
I’ve been noticing a pattern across founders, partners, teams, and even families:
Most relationship problems don’t come from bad people or bad intentions.
They come from relationships running on a default setting.
We assume we’re aligned.
We assume people know our boundaries.
We assume expectations are clear.
We assume we’re on the same page.
And then we’re surprised when tension shows up as:
- confusion
- broken trust
- inconsistent performance
- emotional blowups
- friction that shouldn’t even exist
Not because anyone is wrong, but because the relationship was never designed.
Here’s the shift:
Every relationship in your life gets better the moment you decide to design it instead of drifting into it.
When you do this, everything becomes easier:
- conversations flow
- accountability feels natural
- expectations get clear
- trust deepens
- people feel safer
- decisions happen faster
- conflict becomes productive instead of personal
This isn’t a coaching tool. It’s a life tool.
Scroll further down to get into it in part 2.
If you’re an entrepreneur, or know one who would benefit from creating clarity, aligning their team, building momentum, and growing their business with the Bloom Growth system, I’d love to connect.
Here’s some Inner Game wisdom to chew on this week
1 question to punch your brain this week
Are you building a legacy — or just a résumé?
2 questions (and answers) from me
- What’s the biggest mistake ambitious people make?
They chase momentum instead of meaning. Movement feels like progress, but it’s often avoidance. - What’s the hardest part of growth?
Outgrowing the version of yourself that everyone still expects you to be.
3 insights for the Inner Game Junkies
- Discipline Is a Form of Self-Respect
It’s not about punishment — it’s about honoring what matters most. - Confidence Follows Evidence
You don’t “find” confidence. You stack it — through consistent action. - Fulfillment Is Quiet
It doesn’t announce itself with applause. It’s the peace that comes from alignment.
From Zero to $1 Million: The Playbook No One Talks About
Available now on Apple Podcasts and everywhere you get your podcasts
PART 2
The 4 Relationship Buckets Every Human Interaction Rests On
Whether you’re dealing with a co-founder, partner, child, team member, client, or friend, every relationship rests on four buckets:
1. Trust
“Can I be honest with you without getting punished for it?”
2. Credibility
“Do I believe you know what you’re talking about?”
3. Relationship
“Do I feel connected enough to stay in this conversation when it gets uncomfortable?”
4. Confidence
“Do I feel more capable when I’m around you?”
When even one bucket cracks, the relationship wobbles.
When all four are full, you can build anything together.
The Core Insight Most People Never Learn
You don’t get strong relationships by accident.
You get them by design.
Clarity creates confidence. Design creates safety. Safety creates transformation.
This is the leadership skill no one teaches.
So here it is.
The Relationship Design Framework
(Use this in your next conversation, business or personal.)
1. Start With an Empty Cup
People change from day to day. Don’t walk into conversations with yesterday’s assumptions.
Fresh moment. Fresh listening. Fresh presence.
This one shift will instantly improve your relationships.
2. Set Clear Boundaries
Boundaries are not about control — they’re about clarity.
Say what you need. Say what doesn’t work. Say what helps you be at your best.
Examples you can use today:
- “I want us to work well together — here’s what I need to show up fully.”
- “This is important to me. Can we agree to…?”
- “Here’s where I draw the line, and here’s why.”
People can only honor boundaries they can see.
3. Ask for Permission Before Going Deep
This removes defensiveness like magic.
Try these:
- “Do I have permission to be completely honest right now?”
- “Would you be open to a different perspective?”
- “Can I challenge something you just said?”
Permission creates safety. Safety creates breakthroughs.
4. Make Requests Using ‘Will you…’
This turns expectations into agreements.
Use phrases like:
“Will you follow up by Friday?”
“Will you take ten minutes to reflect on this?”
“Will you help me understand what you meant earlier?”
People step up when they feel invited — not cornered.
5. Create Shared Responsibility (100 / 100)
Not 50/50.
50/50 says: “I’ll do my part only when you do yours.”
100/100 says: “We are both fully responsible for how this relationship works.”
Use this line:
“Can we both take 100% responsibility for how we show up here?”
Instant alignment.
The Question That Changes Every Relationship
Ask this in any meaningful partnership:
“Do you want to design this together?”
This works with:
- a co-founder
- a team member
- a partner
- a sibling
- a friend
- someone you’re in conflict with
- someone you want to collaborate with
Design transforms chaos into collaboration.
The 7-Point Relationship Design Checklist
(A script you can use today)
- State the purpose “I want us to have a great relationship.”
- Share the intention “I want more clarity and ease between us.”
- Set your boundaries “Here’s what helps me be at my best.”
- Ask for their boundaries “What do you need from me to feel supported?”
- Ask for permission “Do I have permission to be honest with you today?”
- Make clear requests “Will you…?”
- Agree on shared responsibility “Can we both take 100% ownership of how we show up?”
This is how adults build high-trust, high-performance relationships.
Not through hope.
Through design.
Brain Candy
Tweets That Made Me Think, Laugh, or Go ‘Huh, Interesting!
Wisdom lives in the space between acceptance and resistance.
Excellence always leaves a trail, just follow the work.
What’s Fueling My Curiosity
📹 WATCH NEXT
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📖 BOOK RECOMMENDATION
How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie
It is one of the first best-selling self-help books ever published. This book is about how to make people like you, how to win people to your way of thinking, and how to change people without arousing resentment.
👓 INTERESTING READ (4 min)
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I’m rooting for you to continue crushing it! 💪🏼
Dhiren
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